Why Bicycles Are Better Than Women... You don't have to be jealous of the guy who works on your Bicycle. If you say bad things to your Bicycle, you don't have to apologize before you ride it again. You can ride your Bicycle as long as you want and it won't get sore. You can stop riding your Bicycle as soon as you want and it won't get frustrated. Your parents won't remain in touch with your old bicycle after you dump it. Bicycles don't get headaches. Bicycles don't insult you if you're a bad rider. Your Bicycle never wants a night out with the other Bicycles. Bicycles don't care if you're late. You don't have to take a shower before you ride your bicycle. If your Bicycle doesn't look good you can paint it or get better parts. You can ride your Bicycle the first time you meet it, without having to take it to dinner, see a movie, or meet its mother. The only protection you have to wear when riding your Bicycle is a decent helmet. When in mixed company, you can talk about what a great ride you had the last time you were on your Bicycle.